Show more

I wonder how many of my interviews are full of random ":w" commands sprinkled in with the answers?

My hairdresser (from the city) just yelled hello from a passing 4WD (near home).

Melbourne Cup? More like Melbourne Nup, amirite?

Just booked studio time for my annual Christmas record. It will be all Burl Ives this time.

I thought I knew tired, and then we hosted a toddler’s birthday party.

Body: "4 day weekend, huh?"
Me: "Yeah, so?"
Body: "What's the time?"
Me: "Huh?"
Germs: "It's time to get ill!"

Sam: "I'm very angry!"
Me: "Why are you angry?"
Sam: "Because I don't want you to talk."
Me: "Oh."
Sam, taking apart LEGO: "I broke your whole world."

“I’m growing,” said Sam matter-of-factly, taking a sip of his babyccino.

Local Toddler Distraught Because Dad Only Made Him Two Pieces Of Toast Instead Of “So Many.”

I looked reviews of the motel on TripAdvisor, and, look, yeah:

"Windows boarded up at the front. Bullets holes in glass. Drugs deals going on outside. Tv bolted down & padlocked. Rattling fridge. Basic doesn't cut it. Rubbish, butts & filth. I was so afraid I packed the room furniture against the door. The other 'guests' were up ALL night. It's a dodgy dodgy place in a seedy part of town! "

Watched four cops with rubber gloves pull on protective glasses and head into the super dodgy motel on Sydney Road. 😬

Happy 1st birthday, Alamo! Thank you for only biting me some of the time!

That feeling of complete failure when you’re stuck finding a thing in a game and resort to looking it up.

Typed “LinkedIn” as “LonkedOn” and, look, that’s its name now.

Show more

We eat bandwidth for breakfast.